What Burdamania wants, Burdamania gets.

Never let it be said that I am not a man of the people. I give my fans the quality content they desire! I use the word quality liberally. Veeeery liberally.

(Note: Not much poker related content, but if you're looking for that, there's some at the very bottom)

So I haven't been playing much poker. Mostly cause I suck and don't wanna go busto, but also because I decided to get myself a new car since apparently my current car needs new axles because there's nothing left of the old ones on the account of me ripping it up and down the parkway at 90+ everytime i drive and NYC roads aren't exactly pothole free.

For you mechanic types: My cv's are totally torn, the axles are completely bare, and to top it all off a I need a new MAF & thermostat & battery.

Anyway, so better than replacing the axles, I figured I'd just pull a Jman (who, if you're unfamiliar, instead of washing his clothes just goes and buys new ones when the ones he's wearing get dirty) and buy a new car altogether.

Just like poker, variance is such a tease. I find a sexy black CL600 AMG package:




(above obv not actual car, just image for those of you who don't know what those are) being run this past wednesday. Ballin. Those are rare at the auction so maybe I'm finally running good for a change? lol, but on with the story anyway.

So I drive to my boys in the morning, get there about 9, and off we go. They're running it #270 or something like that on lane 13. Lane opens 9am, they run roughly 100 cars an hour...we get there 10ish. All good right? Wrong. We can't get our bidder badges. Account suspended! Ballin! Who buys 100k worth of cars and forgets to pay for them? Only people who would be friends with me. Anyway, he finds some checks and some cash and pays like the minimum to get activated and we're on our way.

Monitor says 13 is @ 125. Nice. We've got time to go drag race it around the parking lot and blow the engine before it even crosses the block. Ballin. So we spend about a half hour looking for the beast and low and behold...its not there. Sigh.

Off we go to operations, making a detour to look at some pathetic 99 CLK that was repainted by a blind monkey:

Jay: "This is the worst paint job I have ever seen"
Jay's boy, V: "I'd buy this for 2k."
Jay: "You know it's gonna do 2150"
V: "$150 blind tax?"

But enough tomfoolery, moving on to operations:

Jay: "The CL600, in 13. Where is it?"
Kind of cute chick with large norse and big boobs: "It's not on 13?"

Now before I continue, let me explain something. This place hires mostly senior citizens and the ugly of the ugly. So on the super rare occassion that there is someone even remotely attractive working here, she is automatically promoted (within her head) to Jessica Alba (or whatever hot chick you may think is currently hot) level hottness. Yeah, it's scary.

Jay: "Apparently not. Else I'd be talking to it and not you."
Yeah, she didn't like that.
Big boobs, now giving me the evil eye: "It's in the sold lot."
Jay: "What's it doing there? Did youuuuu buy it?"
Yeah. She didn't like that either. Apparently, I had blown my flirting chances with that first comment. Oops, I guess I was bluffing a station.


I don't feel like finishing the rest of this, so i guess this blog will be a 2 parter.