Monday, February 22, 2010

Done With Live Poker! For Now!

Ok so I finished my live poker stint......

Recap, I played like 4 more tourneys afterwards, and I got burned out really bad, because the money wasn't that great.

So I will kinda start where I left off....

I busted 2 tourneys then played a HU event, 64 players max and it filled.

I win my 1st match, and my 2nd match.

3rd match round of 16, (which they paid 16 for some absurd reason) I play a fairly competent guy who limps in and bets every flop and seems to call every raise I make on him, and show down better almost every time or I would muck to another bet with air....

So I get extremely pissed and tilted at this guy.

I opened KK he flats flop Kh 3s 2d, he checks I lead he flats, turn is 10h he checks I lead he flats, river is 8h ( Kh 3s 2d 10h 8h) he checks I bet 1300 (we start with 6k) into about 2k he min raises but only puts 2500 out, and I call and before the dealer ships him the pot with his 2h6h I say his min raise had to go to 2600 not 2500 and I throw him the extra chip out of my stack (courtesy) and I have about 2500 now cause I opened up a lead early.

Ok SO I am now short, and about 10 hands later I make a bet on the river in a hand where I brick and throw my 500 chip out and announce 300, and he calls, the dealer ships him the pot and I ask for my change and I get no change because the dealer who is sitting 3 feet from me nor him heard me announce 300..... so we call floor over, I know what the ruling is going to be, but come on man I gave you the extra chip when you can not even make a correct raise out of courtesy and you think I am trying to scandal you???

So that tilted the fuck out of me we played for another 40 minutes where I squeezed for his BB and stole blinds from the BB and limped every button trying to connect one flop but failed and he beats me when my A9 loses to AQ but oh well.... I had a flash of rage in me when I didnt get my 200 back when I could have let the dealer ship him a short pot cause he is too stoooooopid to make a fucking minimum raise.

I decided that was my last tourney til the main happened. So I played cash games for the next 2 days.

Friday was really slow not one 5-10 holdem or 10-20 holdem snapped off.

So I played 1-2-5 PLO all day (1-2-5 with a rock, 1-2 blinds, 5 to come in, and the winner of the pot gets the rock (5 1$ chips taped together)

So say the cutoff wins the pot he gets the rock and leaves it out, then the hand is dealt, and the button starts the hand PF then goes around the table like that giving the rock the last action.

This sounds like a small game but it isn't, 300 is the minimum buyin which one or two seats will make, but this game had 25-30k on it when time started passing. You can buy in for however much you want.

I flopped the stones in this game 3 or 4 times in a 15 hand span vs 2 fish, and lost every single one of them, I had 9 8 5 6 with diamonds on a 2d 3d 4x board and cant fade A5XX with Ds when we get in on flop, flopped top set vs bottom set and gutshot and lost the pot, and another hand where I flopped a wrap and nut flush draw and lost to a bigger wrap.

So I tilted after this and tried to crack AAXX PF 3 times and failed (its not hard to find AAXX people play those face up.... so I just repotted PF every time and got it in for about 1k at a time and lost all 3, was stuck about 5k in the game at the low point, took a walk got off tilt came back played well sucked out once, not too bad, was 9 outs... and went on with my life got even made 500$ and went to sleep.

The next night we are playing 5-10 with a 25$ button straddle NL Holdem, this is a huge game... This game had 75-100k on it by nights end, and everyone seemed to be stacked 10-15k deep....

I played 2 interesting hands..... well 1 isn't interesting its kamikaze on me....

I have K2c on the button the C/O has been opening to 85-110 prob 30% of the hands, being very agg.

So I flat his raise in a 3way pot (he is about 7k deep)

Flop 7c 5d 2s

He leads 165 I make it 450 he makes it 950 and I flat

Turn is a 6h BUT WAIT, the dealer prematurely peeled this card so it goes back in, and they deal the river out then shuffle the turn back in.

So the turn is a Jh now

he leads 700 I make it 1900 and he flats.

River coming, 6h AGAIN!

C'man ship me a K or 2, I got rid of a dead card when I was going to brick 6h Jh and I go Jh 6h

So he checks and threatens that he isn't going anywhere...

So I move all in about 5 seconds after he says this and he snaps me with AA

Could not rep a set there, was about a 13-14k pot and I was stuck almost 10k.... sigh....

BUT Luckily I have history with a mega fish there and doubled up from 6500 to 13k

Long story short, fish leads flop and turn with Qs Jh on Qh 10h 7h board and I have AhJd

3h on riv unpaired board he bets approx same as he did on turn and I overship for like 4500 more and he tanks and calls.

Then I got sick value out of AA one hand, betting 3 streets on 10c 8c 6d 5d 7c and taking a little over 1200 that hand, but was very happy to bet river and get called by a mucking hand.


Ok so the interesting hand....

Utg opens to 100 mid flats and I have AK in the C/O and I make it 440$ and both flat.

flop Kd Jc 2h

Both check to me and I check

turn Qd

UTG leads out 700 mid folds and now its to me, and I take about 10 seconds in folding... This is an interesting hand to me for some reason....

I mean I know he can not lead the turn with air here, I have to be behind somehow, but what if a rag peels the turn? What if I bet the flop? I wasn't going to bet the flop here because we were all so damn deep and I had no intentions of playing a 1,000 BB pot with 1 pair like my friend with the AA, I planned on flatting turns or betting turns and possibly folding rivers. So not really an interesting hand, but he showed me KK so it seemed it could have been a disaster hand for me.

So I ended up breaking even in that game, stupid me to try to bluff a guy off AA..... I found out later the guy is worth like 100M owns a ton of car dealerships etc etc, information that would have been useful a little earlier....

The most fun part of this night though was we played "lodden thinks" idk where this game came from but I saw people in australia playing it and it was funny, so this kid sits down and he is just beligerantly drunk and it struck me that he would be the perfect Lodden...... He was the perfect Lodden and more...

So for anyone who doesn't know how to play, all it takes is 3 people, 2 people betting and 1 person answering the questions. The 2 people betting take turns asking Lodden the Qs

Example, I ask this kid what size waist he thinks someone at the table wears, he comes up with the answer in his head, the 2 people betting come up with what they think Lodden thinks, then we put our answers in our phone, Lodden tells us what he thought and whoever is closest wins.


We were asking the kid how many hands he played at the casino this week, he thought he played 4200 hands, we asked him what size waist one of the players had, the guy had a 34 waist the kid guessed 42, we asked him how much money was in my stack (i had 14k he guessed 5k) we asked him some other stuff I can't remember, none of the questions were out of line or anything we were just having fun, this kid could barely keep his head up....

So we ask him another Q and he stares me down, and says "How about we go outside and I beat your ass, how do you like that answer" the whole table busts up now, cause I am not a big guy, but this kid is a heck of a lot smaller than me... So he says this line about 5-10 times with laughter coming each time, then he apologizes to me, cause we know each other kinda, then he threatens me again then apologizes, then tries to figtht the biggest guy at the table... he takes a walk talked to some friends I guess and has a new line when he gets back.... He now keeps saying on top of the original line. "I am a grown ass man and I will take you outside and whip your ass if you keep fucking with my character" He keeps asking us if its funny, we say yes then he goes back to saying his lines... Was very comical.... He busted soon after, he only bought in for like 2k but it didn't last too long.


So I go home go to sleep and get up to play the 3k Main event.

So I get to the main event and play for 2 hours, I pick up a few pots go from the 15k start stack to 20k, then I get a cooler vs a fish, but I probably could have salvaged some chips... but I am too agg, and want to stack people every hand I played.

I have AhKd and open the button 3x to 100, SB makes it 1300, BB flats I flat, I wish I had folded here, but... I mean in normal tourneys online, my hand is probably a ship 95% of the time, but people don't 3bet light in live tourneys around here, mostly fish.... though the SB was a really good player.

Well flop is Kh Qh 3d

SB checks BB bets 2k I flat SB folds

Turn is a 5h BB bets 3k I ship he calls off 9k more with QQ and I brick the river.

I could have folded my hand PF, I could have folded it on the flop, I could have folded on the turn, though I think I have to flat the turn at this point with a heart draw. But I could have mucked my hand twice for sure, and even the turn I should be mucking, but was 3k to call into 11k when he has 9k behind.... Basically I am a fish and didn't want to play I guess....

So I came home to play online, and I am getting back to work, I have a lot of work to to make up some losses from Australia and here.... Gonna be a long couple months especially with no action on PDC, been planted at HU tables for 6 hours now without a bite.

One more funny thing about the main, I had an over under bet with a guy for 500$, whether or not there would be 60+ players, 59 or less he won 61 or more I won, and 60 meant we flipped a coin for the 500$...

They take late registration for 1 hour, about 40 minutes in its at 59 players has been stuck on 59 for about 20-30 minutes now, and low and behold the guy I bet with comes and sits down next to me with ticket #60 haha and 60 holds and we flip a coin and I won the flip.

There you go a long terrible update

When I get around to it I will post pics of my new house, my poker setup etc cause I said I would and I have been lazy thus far in doing so. I will promise that in my next post

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Something has to change.

Okay.

I've had enough. I am sick of myself and I am sick of going on idiotic tilt 3 times a month and cutting my monthly profits in half. Every year I throw away 150k doing this.

Last night I played worse than I have all year or maybe ever. It was so bad, it was almost unbelievable. I literally got smashed in the face with the deck and managed to LOSE 30K!!!!!

HOW DO I DO THAT?!

And it all boils down to the same thing I have always said not to do that I keep doing.

1. Playing when extremely tired/falling asleep.
2. Playing insanely long sessions.
3. Playing on tilt.
4. Not having a stop loss.
5. Not being able to walk away with a losing session.

I can't do this anymore. I either need to change this or I need to quit poker.

I am very serious. How long can I continue to be self destructive and turn hard work and grueling hours of grinding into misery because I am stuck 3 buyins and don't want to book a losing session? Sure there are times when I pull it together and get it back, but there are times that the wheels fall off completely and I end up spewing for no reason.

Sometimes my brain just turns off.

So here we are and this is that crucial point people have in their careers: I will either over come this flaw or I will quit.

1. I will NOT play when I am tired or not feeling it. I don't care who's playing. I don't care if the biggest fish in the world is playing 5 buy ins deep. If I don't want to play, if I am tired, if I am on tilt, I WILL NOT PLAY. The end. Absolutely no questions. No desire = no game.

1a. There is a good chance, considering I hate poker, I will never again want to play...or not want to play often enough...in this case, I will designate X hours, when I am feeling good and thinking clearly to play.

2. I will quit whenever I feel like I am going to tilt. if I do not recover in 20 minutes or less, I will walk away. No questions asked. If I do not walk away when I am tilting, I will send Dudu $100 for every hour I play on tilt.

3. I am designating a 4 buyin stop loss for any game 5-10+ and a 5 buyin stop loss for any game 3-6 and below.

4. I will not play more than 6 hours a day.

4a. If I am focused and calm, I may play 8 hours.

5. I will try to play shorter sessions. Ideally, I will break the sessions down into either 3 2 hour sessions or 2 3 hour sessions.

6. I will invoke SOME game selection. Instead of playing tough or semi tough opponents when there is no action, I will spend as much time as I can stomach reviewing my play and studying the game away from the tables.

7. I will try to play at least 30 minutes a day of PLO.

8. I will balance out my life by returning to both weight training and kick boxing. Poker will not interfere with either of these activities.

9. I will not alienate my friends during hardcore poker binges - which will be coming to a stop.

10. I will not be a complete retard tilting moron.


If this list is not completed and this tilt issue is not COMPLETELY fixed by WSOP time...If I still go on crazy sick spew sessions...it will be my last WSOP and I will quit poker.

I spend way too many hours and way too much time playing to just tilt my profits away. If I can't do this, I'll...I don't know...go write brothel reviews or something.

I may take the next few weeks off, I don't know.

Whatever the case is...I am very unhappy with myself. Here's hoping that I am not as dumb as I think I am and can overcome this.

Good luck me.

J

I am retarded.

Promise to explain fully later when I am not on insanity tilt. I swear I am dumb. I cannot even understand. Why I am so dumb but I am just dumb.

That is my life. I am an idiot.

I don't learn. Only idiots never learn.

Monday, February 15, 2010

Day 3 (of 11) of Aussie Punishment, Sick Slide Graph, Very Little Bitching?

First off this is my graph of headsup play since about November.... November, December, they went well, I was up about 55k? Running neutral EV.... (incase you dont understand these graphs, the thick green line is profit, the thin one is my "expected value" (expected all in value) So this is where I should be... Now I admit, I could cut down some of the losses from tilt.... I do tilt bad sometimes. But it is just the sickest thing ever. The downslide started about 12-13k hands ago, and I lose 100K????? Running over 50k below EV???? Tilting a bunch off because it is happening so fucking quickly????? WTF!!!!!

So my PDC roll is a little lighter now and it sucks....

I have been grinding slowly at FTP and PS, and almost decided to quit, I have an "hourly" of over 110$ an hour at 1-2 on both sites but you can't do that all day long. I have 16-20 tables loaded and it just wears you out, I play an hour then I quit. I go dick off on PS3 or something else for a couple hours and then decide I still am not looking forward to playing again so I don't. If I ever feel the need to make 1k a week for the rest of my life, I know where I will do it. But I have bigger ambitions of course, as I promised to make 350k this year but I am starting about 110k in the hole so this is going to be difficult now. I have faith though, luckbox a tourney and I am gold.



So I decided for punishment for the way I treated the trip to the Aussie Millions I would play all 11 of the Oklahoma State Championships of Poker events.


Day 1 was PLO, I cashed (kinda fluked, 131 entrants, 14 pay, we were round for round and I busted 15th but someone busted behind me so we chopped 14th... profit of 15$ off my 340$) (total play, 11 hours) (+2 hours on cash before the tourney, lost 1300$ playing 2-5)


Day 2, NLH 100k guaranteed. This event drew over 800 players somehow, I finished 20th for 1600$ profit of 1300$, sigh... time played, 15 hours


Day 3, just got home, was Limit O8, 92 entries, 10 pay, I get 10th.... lost a couple pots late, somehow cashed.... Had one big blind when we sat down with 10 left... time played 12 hours


Tomorrow, PLO8


All buyins are 340$


So why is this punishment? Well because other than the 800 player NLH I dont think a single tourney will pay over 20k to winner. As if I am going to win one, but hey atleast I have cashed all 3, kinda.


I am doing it as kind of "training" to be able to play long hours day in and day out live, and not have the luxury of my PS3 or cable tv or couch to nap or go eat when I want to etc etc. I have treated every live poker trip I have ever made very poorly, and I am starting to reallize how much money I have pissed away doing that. It is terrible the way I go on trips for poker, I go get super drunk play table games, give money away playing poker, strip clubs etc etc, and I am finally realizing how important it is to treat poker more like a "business" and not a hobby considering I dropped out of school to play poker and this has been my source of income for 5 years in May and I want it to be my source of income for atleast 5-10 more years.


Live poker typically is a vacation for me, even if it is close to home, it is a chance to get out of the house socialize with people who have the same ambitions (of being a degenerate gambler as such I guess) and obviously typically get hammered drunk.


I have not had anything to drink other than a couple redbull and vodkas (despite the fact I hate them) to keep me awake the first day since I was coming off my fucked up sleep schedule.


So 8 more days, it is a grind, I won't make much money unless I get top 3 in the main event they have which is a 3k buyin.


The reason I probably decided to punish myself, they are giving 5k to whoever accumulates the most points during the series of events, and I am going to win it.... Though I was told tonight how they are "supposedly" keeping the points, and it is fucked, but I will still win I think thanks to the deep run in the 800 player field. Basically you get 1 point for entering the tourney, and 1 point more for every place "inside the money" you get. So the 800 player field payed 72 places, winner gets 73 points, I got 53 points, so catching him is very doable if I get top 3 in a couple of the small fields. Since I don't think any other tourney is paying more than 20 spots, it could actually backfire, hopefully not though, I have cashed all 3 so I am playing well for the most part. Another incentive, you get a RING!!!!!!!! Which I can wear when I am wearing my HPT Jacket!!!!!!! Or just put the ring in the pocket of the HPT Jacket and hang it deep in my closet.


Ummmm other than that, nothing else to say.... Hopefully I don't snap before this ends, and hopefully I gain some valuable attributes to help myself when I go to play poker out of town. Turning away cocktails for water is so tough to do but getting easier for me.... I am such a lush....

Thursday, February 11, 2010

I am so sick of FT.

How is it every session I play I am stuck 5k with a positive adjusted ev? So great.

So a few days ago I finally snapped and went on world famous Jay Tilt and turned what was a +10k month on FT into a -4k month. Great. So now I hate myself.

So after tilting off what was going to pay my bills, I decided to take a break. Of course, that only lasts until I open the software, see a donk at 10-20 and lose 2 coin flips to him. Then he leaves and the game breaks. This is followed up by fish coming to play heads up, who sucks out, wins some flips, coolers me, etc. Wins 2 buyins, leaves. Then this fish is either replaced by a nitty reg or someone who's actually good. Nitty reg will quit unless I spew to him, good player will annoy me because I'm already annoyed at having to play a good player after fish keep leaving. FJHDFJKSDHFJKHDJF

On an amusing side, many of the regs are pretty bad with more leaks than dudu after he's eaten an eigth of psychedelic mushrooms and snorted 5 lines of meth.

So I'm stuck like 7-8k at fullofshitpoker now. Great.

I guess I ran good there at some point in my life (although I do not remember this) and am now paying for it. Wonderful. Please, more of this. MORE I SAY.

Tuesday, February 09, 2010

Pulling My Hair Out!

Ok so I am just in Jerry mode again, I run like shit vs Jerry, even though he is a bad PLO player, I can't even explain how many bad spots I got into with Jerry or the guy I just finished playing at 5-10 but I lost an arm and a leg, I have like one more deep session in my PDC acct before I have to drop and rebuild.... I am so so so tilted right now....

My HEM isn't running so I can't see how far below EV I am running last few days but my favorite hand played today was vs a fish at 5-10 PLO HU

I have 3 4 5 6 double soooted

We are about 3500 deep each (well I was covering him, but this hand turned it around)

I open, he 3bets to 90 I 4bet to 270 he makes it 810, I flat.

Flop THE NUTS

2 3 5 with 2 spades, I have no spades....

He checks, I bet like 1200, he ships I call

he has A 10 9 5 with no spade draw......

Board is 2 3 5.....

5.........

9........

Ship almost 7k to him

I tilt and get coolered more, will admit I was building big pots with marginal hands but..... I was still getting coolered ridiculously.

Towards the end of my session the guy I am playing is literally doubling me with TPTK in PLO and beating my ass.... All I need is 2 pair and I double up, then I make a set or something and start jamming and he backdoors something crazy that I give him no credit for having because he is paying me off so light I keep jamming into his backdoored nuts after he doubles me, so I go 100bb to 200bb then coolered then repeat...... yay

I am just proud of myself for not breaking anything during this session, I was punching my mouse to fold for a bit.

Sunday, February 07, 2010

FU FTP

Played 6k hands straight to finish stuck 3500 with an adjusted ev of +6k. Absolutely fantastic.

This is how I'm running:




SB: $738.00

Hero (BB): $1338.00

BTN: $1015.00



Pre Flop: ($15.00) Hero is BB with 7 of clubs 8 of clubs

1 fold, SB raises to $20, Hero calls $10



Flop: ($40.00) 6 of hearts 9 of spades 5 of spades (2 players)

SB checks, Hero bets $25, SB raises to $50, Hero raises to $145, SB raises to $240, Hero raises to $1318 all in, SB calls $478 all in



Turn: ($1476.00) 9 of diamonds (2 players - 2 are all in)



River: ($1476.00) 6 of clubs (2 players - 2 are all in)



Final Pot: $1476.00

SB shows K of diamonds 9 of clubs (a full house, Nines full of Sixes)

Hero shows 7 of clubs 8 of clubs (a straight, Nine high)

SB wins $1475.00

(Rake: $1.00)





Played fairly badly for half the session tho...got into some ugly spots that should have been avoided and some folds should have been made. Played really well the other 50% of the time.

Play grade: B+


Slowrolling - as far as I'm concerned there's no such thing as slow rolling in online poker 99% of the time. I've been falsely accused of slowrolling in the past, the truth is I was just busy multitabling. So because someone doesn't insta call you with the nuts, doesn't mean they're slowrolling you...they could be busy elsewhere. Sometimes, you might even hit time bank just to slow the action down. For example, lets say you're playing 6 tables and you have a tough decision to make on 2 or 3 of them and a simple call with aces on another, you might hit the timebank just to buy yourself some time between hands to focus on the two tough decisions you have. Plus even if people aren't multitabling, they could be busy watching tv, surfing the web, chatting on AIM or whatever.

On the other hand, if it is quite obvious they are slowrolling you on purpose, proceed to rules of engagement.

J

Thursday, February 04, 2010

Poker Etiquette According To Jay

Okay, so I've been meaning to do this blog for a while but have just never gotten around to it...so here goes. Some of it may look contradictory...but it's really not if you think about it.

1. Don't rathole! This is probably the single most disgusting thing you can do in a poker game. What is ratholing? It's when you buy in short at a particular limit, double up and immediately leave only to buy in short at another table of the same limit, double up and repeat the process. This isn't against any poker rule but is highly annoying and classless.

2. Don't hit n run. If you cooler someone the first hand, at least play them for a while before quitting. Nobody likes to get it in Kings vs Aces in the first 3 hands only to have their opponent quit.

3. Give ample quiting notice if you've been playing a heads up match for a while with someone you don't know or don't play frequently, especially if you're both regulars. For example, if you decide to two table some regular you don't usually play, let them know 30 minutes before you'll quit. It's common courtesy. This isn't necessary if you're playing with someone who you play daily since they know you'll be back tomorrow or the next day...but it is still nice to give a warning.

4. Don't ever talk poker strategy or make fun of how anyone played any hand at the table. Do not talk about anything related to playing hands. It doesn't matter and serves no purpose. You're only making an uncomfortable environment or improving the game play of others. Just shut up.

5. Don't make fun of recreational players just looking to have a good time. Everyone wants to be happy and have a good time when they play. They don't want to lose and feel bad afterwards. It's okay to kid around with regulars or semi regulars because they're less likely to not comeback...but in general it's just far better to keep a positive atmosphere for everyone.

6. Do not be a nosey moron. It's not polite to ask anyone how much they are up or down on the day. How much their bankroll is or anything else. It's none of your business.

7. Do not beg anyone for money. No one will give you a dollar. No one cares about you, no one cares that you need money to gamble. Maybe your mom does. Ask her for money.

8. Do not block any one's heads up tables. If you don't want to play them then leave! I don't care if they've been following you around for a week. Either post your blind or leave. Tables do not belong to you just because you were the first one to sit, tables belong to the person who's ready to play.

9. If you're going to bumhunt and only play the most terrible players, respect the guys who 1. play anyone 2. are willing to sit and play tough opponents to get a game going. Do not have more heads up tables open than them. Understand that they do not have to and probably don't respect you. You are a parasite who doesn't do anything to help games, you only hurt them and profit. You do not get first dibs on fish, you get last.

10. If you see a regular siting by themselves and a fish happens to join, do not run like a vulture if you're there only to play the fish. The guy sitting for 2 hours trying to start a game might be annoyed.

11. If 2 people are playing heads up at a non heads up table and have been for a while, do not interrupt their game if they ask you not to!

12. If the fish quits, do not instaquit the game. At least play 2 or 3 orbits before sitting out...maybe another will join. This goes double if you happened to stack the fish.

13. Do not ever complain about running bad if you are beating someone. If you're up several buyins, you cannot be running all that bad. Plus no one cares anyway. Stop whining.

14. If you see someone losing a lot of money, do not sit in the game and tell them to stop playing. Every time I see this, I want to punch this Mother Theresa wannabe in the face. No one needs your advice.

15. If someone sits down at your table and he game is heads up and you both post blinds, but you don't want to play at this time and win their BB...if they ask for their blind back, return it. If this person was only there to hit and run you or buy short to double up and leave, feel free to steal and sit out.

16. It is acceptable to demand a full buy in (at least 100bb at deep tables) at any time. It is acceptable to quit a game at any time if your opponent refuses to rebuy to the max amount. Offering your opponent the chance to play at lower stakes is highly appreciated. For example, if you've been playing 25-50 and your opponent has 1500 left and refuses to rebuy, it is acceptable to offer them a game at 5-10 instead.

17. Never ever apologise for sucking out. Who cares? I'd like to suck out every time I get it in behind. I'd be very happy about it.

18. Never ever say "Nice Hand" if you win the pot. Who are you saying nice hand to? Yourself?

19. Never make challenges you don't intend to keep. If you challenge someone to heads up, don't back down.

20. If you play 1-2, don't pretend you can beat 10-20 because you "think" a fish is playing. It's like me saying, I can go beat the 500-1000 game because one of the players seems weaker than the rest...when I couldn't possibly have the slighest idea because I've never played 500-1000 with aforementioned player. Don't mouth off, you just look stupid commenting from the rail.

21. Making fun of idiots who break these etiquette rules is not only acceptable, it is encouraged...unless they are really bad and going to quit the game. Basically the rule is, if the guy won't quit the game, you can make fun of him all you want if there's reason to do so. For example, he is a jerk, he is making fun of bad recreational players, being the table coach, ratholing, etc.

Rules of Engagement:

1. Always give someone a second chance. Never give them a third.

2. If someone is nice, be nice. And vice versa.

3. It is acceptable to needle someone in a friendly, and not an offensive, demeaning or hostile way if you think it will tilt them or keep them playing longer or whatnot. However, it is probably unwise and you're better off not doing it because they may just leave or not rebuy after losing. Usually this only works on competitive people or anyone with something to prove, not those just looking to relax and have a good time. Each situation is different - use your own judgement but it's better to just not say anything.


4. If someones sole intent is to be the biggest jerk possible, then nothing is off limits. People who are jerks don't understand anything but other jerks. Feel free to say the most harshest things imaginable to them without a shred of remorse.

Examples:

If a guy's sole intent is to join every single one of your heads up tables to steal your blind and leave because he knows it annoys you and has absolutely no intention of playing, then wishing him death in the most gruesome way possible is perfectly acceptable.

If someone wins 4 coin flips in a row on you, it is not acceptable to hope their family dies in a catastrophe. You get the point.

Remember, everyone has bad days once in a while but for the most part you get what you give.

----------

Obviously at some point all of us have broken some of these etiquette guidelines but I hope that most try to adhere to them whenever possible....except for depeche...who's a complete fcuking moron...but that's a blog for a different time.

There's probably a bunch of stuff I forgot, but this blog is already too long anyway.

Daily blogging...if this keeps going...I'll be out of material for when we get a real site.

Don't be bad etiquette donks!

Jay

P.s. One day I'll write up an instructional guide on how to completely aggravate people at the table...because if there's one thing I'm good at - it's pissing people off!

Wednesday, February 03, 2010

Who knew?!!

And more importantly...why wasn't I told?!

What am I talking about? The retardonkathon known as FTP in the early mornings of US Eastern time. I've been playing a bunch there lately...mostly heads up late night US time since my sleep schedule is all screwed and I am up from 3am to noon. It's kind of hard getting donks and bumhunters to play me HU and after getting the old no ty like 10 straight times I decided to just multi table 6max.

Usually I don't bother with 6max because the games aren't great but more importantly because there's always a huge list..and I can't be bothered waiting forever and then having the game break in 2 orbits...but the last few days I've been getting a seat right away and there's at least one huge mega donk per table. To top that off, the regulars sitting are horrendous.

There are two Italians who are both 6 figure winners in the game and are absolutely awful. I would pay money to play them heads up.

FTP games are usually tough so I have no idea if this is just good timing or a flukey string or what but there's been tons of value. Let's hope it continues.

Dudu made a girl cry on a date. Lets discuss how terrible of a human being he is.

Also anybody who hacks and absolutely trashes the page of that retard who's bot has been spamming our comments, or the pages of anyone who left any spam in our comments for that matter, will forever be a glorious hero and dudu will hang their picture in his "war room" for all to marvel at!

Jay

Tuesday, February 02, 2010

Back from Australia

Ok so, I am back from Australia.

I want to quit my entry here but I will continue for the sake of it.

I lost like 30k on the trip, my last update here said I was suck 27k or so, I was stuck 32kish at most, I got back within 3k of even, then I had one hell of a drunk session that cost me quite a bit of money. Then I booked my flight back 2 days early and headed home, only to not make it home for 5 days.

HOORAH

So I busted the main event in 50 minutes, I was still playing like a noob at this point, I didn't care to play at all.

I played serious in the 5k HU event, and got fuckkked.

I played 10-20 with a 40$ straddle cash, was playing well not drinking too much then I decided to have about 25 cocktails in 7 hours (I was trying to get a 3:1 prop bet from people earlier in the day that I could have 30 cocktails in 12 hours and profit at 10 20 NL only getting 5 minute breaks every hour to piss and smoke etc) Noone took me up on the bet, so I proceeded to try it with no incentives and I got through 23 cocktails in about 7-8 hours and spewed about 25k off in the last 20 hands I played.... Ridiculous to be honest.

So I go to a titty bar that night, get a couple more drinks, just obliterated at this point. Next morning I change my flights to get me back in time to attempt to repeat my HPT win at my local casino, idk why I would try to fly this far to make this, I just wanted out of Australia really.

So I get on a flight and basically to make a long story short it took 32 hours to get to this casino, my luggage got lost, but is now found, I wore the same clothes for like 4 days, I had no toothbrush so I was buying mouthwash every morning at this gift shop at the hotel, but they dont sell toothbrushes? I busted main event quickly, I lost in cash games to coolers, I lost like 35k on eveyrthing PLUS like 15k on PDC playing PLO one day so Australia cost me about 50,000$ and now I am furious.

SO I am motivated once again.

Starting in 14 days or less I am going to be playing 7-8 hours a day minimum. I am going to play all year long, only skipping days for special events, 4th July, Weddings, Bachelor Party, ummm things I am contractually binded to for the most part. I am going to make at minimal 300k online this year, and doing this I will be starting as a 1-2 reg on FTP and PS and my normal 5-10 and 10-20 on PDC and I hope to be at 5-10 on PS and FTP by June, (well June on FTP and like next Jan for PS probably....) I am so fucking pissed about how I treated the Australia trip..... It was a fucking waste of time and money.

I am making my computer room as I type kind of, I will post pics of my new house sometime when the snow is all gone and I find motivation to do so, and I get eveyrthing put where I want it. My "war room" is going to be sick though. I will basically have 2 large monitors with a 42" LCD wall mounted above them so I can watch cable while I play on my L desk in my leather office chair. Would revert to a beanbag, but I already have the L desk and it was kind of expensive so I don't want to waste it.

Ummm Yea that is all I have for now....


A criminals best asset is his lie ability, dont forget that.

Monday, February 01, 2010

Dudu and I love Norwegians

Okay so we have a few things for todays blog:


1. No, I didn't actually flip a quarter and decide to call with that KQ...and lol @ someone asking me this. I remember this hand clearly and I remember thinking about it for a good 20-30 seconds before calling. It was not a spew nor a bad call, otherwise I would have folded. I remember looking over that hand at the end of the session and still deciding it was a call. Results don't really matter, it just happened to turn out good.


2. Some of you asked about blogging here with us...and it's a request I've had before...well there's good news and bad news.

The good news: I've decided several months ago to turn this into a real site not some BS blogspot like it currently is. Of course we'll have member blogs and what not...and if your blog doesn't suck and by doesn't suck I mean actually funny/entertaining...and people like it...and by people I mean ME...we'll throw it up on the front page (dont hold me to this) so everyone can read it and post derogatory comments calling you an ahole. Of course if your blog sucks and your name isn't Jay or Dadu, you'll never see the front page and continue sucking all by yourself.

The bad news: I am lazy. It takes me forever to actually do something otherwise we would have had a real site years ago. So bear with me...the good thing is while I may be slow, I actually get shit done...it just takes me a while. Also, a big help would be if anyone here can build websites or do anything related to website building or know anyone who does...your assistance would be appreciated.


3. So I played like 14hours straight between Jan 30 & Jan 31 cause I really didn't feel like having a losing Jan. I started the month like +6k then followed it up by -16k spewcity to Jerry so I had to get myself into enough of a plus to not commit suicide. So 14 hours of any 2 vs anyone at any time makes me a winner. Do not try this strategy.

So I ended up waking up at like 8pm on Sunday...fast forward a day of almost no action and at like 5am I decide to play 5-10 for an hour before going to bed vs some mediocre reg who gives me action. So at this point I'm kind of tired and playing idiotically and I end up going on total spew city for like 4buyins...so now I'm mega stuck and I realize the only way I'll get unstuck is 10-20...but he won't play 10-20...so I open the first 10-20 table I see and sit vs a decent regular.

Of course now I am annoyed that I got myself into this situation and I proceed to continue playing like a tard and suicide bluff off 2 buyins. Now I'm stuck 8k and have been playing for several hours and I'm mega pissed because I am about to start Feb stuck 8k for no reason other than I wanted to mess around 5-10 for an hour and just spewed off 8k. Then to make my problems worse, dudu comes online.

First thing's first, I curse him out for no reason. Then I curse him out for not making me quit stuck 2k. Then we have a conversation about the hooker he bought in Australia and proceeds to tell me literally some of the dumbest things I have ever heard. I wish I saved the conversation so I can post the transcripts here but I didn't. The gist of it was basically he doesn't consider escorts hookers because, wait for it, "they are classy". This went on for a few minutes and the more he told me about his theories that because you order them from a catalog instead of picking them up from the casino floor and because you can "take them to dinner", they're classy. I was amazed...I didn't think dudu could shock me anymore...how wrong I was.

Laughing at Dudu must have woken me up because I decided there was no way I was going to start February stuck 8k...so I kind of caught my 2nd wind and mounted a comeback vs both opponents before quiting with a whopping +$500ish on the 5 or so hour session.

I played a few interesting hands...but the most fun by far was the last hand at the 10-20 table where I folded what looked to be like the best hand, but was likely to not be, to a river bet and dudu chastised me for it over AIM for making what appeared to be a bad fold. I told him he was out of his mind an we argued over it. So we decided to make the Norwegian I was playing tell us what he had...but he wouldn't. So dudu offered him $200 (we have this thing where Dudu is making me flip him once a day for the course of the year at $200 a pop) from me if he had me beat and $200 from dudu if he was bluffing. So the guy of course says he had the nut straight, dudu doesn't believe him...and we request a screen shot.

Dude was actually a good sport and imageshacks the hand...with...obv the nut straight and dudu's forced to ship him $200.

Let's all laugh at dudu as some scando is using his money to buy himself soccer jerseys.


Boom! A meat and potatoes update!

Jay